Hello friends!!! I am finally inspired to write to you all again after having my baby and taking some time away! He is 8 months old and the epitome of cute. We are all so in love. And let’s be honest, I wasn’t super consistent in the first place! Yay kids!

I have been in the thick of maternity leave many times and have found some great things to help me during this time. You know, you don’t quite feel like yourself and you are wondering if you ever will again. If you had a c-section you may be struggling even more with recovery. And you are learning to live with your beautiful newborn. It is all just a lot. Ok. It’s a lot.

There is so much joy in these times though. And your child will not be the same from day to day as they grow so fast. It is amazing to watch. So let’s talk about things that can help you find yourself again, even if it is a new version, and that will help you be able to just enjoy the time. Here we go!

STRETCHY BOTTOMS

Don’t play with me people, I don’t want your elastic b.s. digging into my tender belly or my c-section scar. There is not an emoji that describes the pain of your waistband slipping onto your scar. You need some tall waisted pants. And stretchy as hell. Physical therapists if they are worth a damn will also tell you to avoid the waistbands that compress tightly. Although you may feel like you want that, it contributes to the pooch that we all hate. Some brands that are not compressing are Lululemon and Glyder. If not ready for leggings which I was not for a bit, yoga pants may be the ticket. These are loose and still high waisted. And let us not forget sweats with a tie so you can cinch them up. For me personally this is a last resort. They fall because I am squishy and then hurt my incision.

Now you may not feel like squeezing into any pants off the bat and that is cool too. Then just wearing a button down nightshirt for easy nursing. Something like this and then of course you can put some pj shorts on if it helps. You are already nearly wearing a diaper so you don’t feel like you are naked under there.

SKIN TO SKIN

For the first two months, I was in a bra and undies. I was skin to skin with him the whole time. I didn’t dress him unless absolutely necessary. I know how fast it goes and while the little outfits are so cute and I put them on him for a picture quick, the skin to skin was more important. It facilitates on demand nursing, regulates their body temperature, let’s me nap with them, helps bonding and so much more.

And to be honest, any clothes for the first week after coming home from the hospital are just awful. I was so bloated and full of fluids that everything felt tight. And I was laying around in my bed, I don’t need some cute pj set for that. Let’s normalize the minimal things we need and focus on taking care of ourselves.

BREASTFEEDING SUPPLIES

I have another post all about what I use for nursing supplies that you can find here. I just wanted to make sure that it was noted in this post that you need breastfeeding supplies while on maternity leave.

Many people make stations with all of their supplies so you can move about your house without having to tote along a basket full of stuff. I would recommend maybe two spots for that. Where you sleep and wherever you go to be awake for the day once you are feeling up to getting back into a routine.

You also don’t need to rush out and buy a ton of stuff for said baskets. I have a post on the only things you actually need for a newborn that you can see here. What I’m talking about here is diapers, wipes, extra onesie, nipple cream and any other nipple devices you may need, lip balm, special toys for an older child and burp rags.

The one thing that would probably move with me besides baby and blanket is my water bottle. I was fortunate to have my husband home for weeks at a time with each of my kids and he was able to carry some stuff for me or get me a spot ready. So I never even made one of these anywhere but my room. The basket I had in my room was this and it was so nice to have stuff right by me.

PATIENCE

Look you are not going to feel quite right inside your body after this. It is a very difficult process to bring a baby into this world. It took months to grow them and then a ton of time to bring them here. Please be patient with yourself.

Focus on the joy of it all, the gratitude of what your body has done and having a healthy little baby. You may get sad and scared and that is ok too. Bring the focus back to gratitude and let the emotions move through you.

Find gratitude in taking a hot shower as the new you. Give yourself patience and grace about the changes your body has made. Do not judge how you look now. Be fair to yourself. Nourish yourself and your body. Ask for help and get some rest.

Soon you will notice that you don’t feel so weird inside yourself anymore. You will not look the same as you used to but you will know the new you better and the feeling of strangeness will dissipate.

Remember you are amazing and you will always be amazing.

What are some maternity leave must haves that helped you?

And some not so great ones…

Hi friends! I am back sort-of, from maternity leave! I had my son in March and I took the spring and summer to really adjust to being a stay at home mom of 5. That turned into fall and winter. And now I am a homeschool mom too! And I am not adjusted to any of it – AT ALL. Soooo how are you doing?

It was really wonderful to just focus on my family and myself. As much as I can focus on me anyway. I have been trying to get back to working out and including the kids but I have had some strains and it has been slow. And now I am trying to get back to blogging and being consistent there. So without further ado let’s talk about nursing foods!

Have you struggled with baby gas or colic? It is the worst. And if you are breastfeeding you can blame something you ate most likely. What about supply issues? Too much or too little? Well I have dealt with all of these. I thought I would round up some foods and ingredients that are great for breastfeeding and highlight some that are not so much.

I would like to stress that there is not a lot of scientific proof that any of these things increase your supply and that I am not a medical professional. That said, these foods have many great things inside them that are good for you and baby either way as long as it is in moderation.

All right let’s start with oats. Oats are a great food when nursing. They tend to be filling for that crazy breastfeeding hunger and they contain a ton of iron so many lactation specialists recommend oats. I don’t actually care to eat oatmeal prepared the normal way. I always turn steel cut oats into no-bake lactation cookies.

I try to pack in a ton of good stuff into those cookies, of course including m&ms (I am trying to find some without food dyes though) and chocolate chips. One of the other superfoods I put in is flax seeds. Flax seeds or flax meal contain a good amount of Omega-3 fatty acids which is great because I hate taking them in a vitamin.

Moving on down the list you need something to stick those cookies together. In the past I have always used peanut butter but almonds are actually really great for breastfeeding. And while you can eat them raw, you can also use almond butter to make your cookies. Do you see a theme here? I clearly love cookies. Almonds are stock full of magnesium, vitamin E and B vitamins amongst other things. We had a slight scare with our last baby after I had almond milk that made us think he could have a nut allergy. If you notice anything of the sort get medical help.

The next ingredient for my cookies- seriously you can put these ingredients in anything but I love cookies- is brewers yeast. It is packed full of vitamins and minerals. One of which is selenium. Selenium is super important for your thyroid and many, many women have thyroid issues after pregnancy. Selenium can help keep your thyroid functioning well. You can also get selenium from Brazil nuts. I usually have those on hand as well and just eat a couple a day. Brewers yeast has way more than just that though and I love to cover the flavor in some chocolate and nut butter. It is a little bitter.

You can find recipes for these types of no bake cookies all over the internet. And you can add things you like. Those are just a few of the superfood ingredients I like to use while nursing and when I am not!

And of course, let us not forget, green leafy vegetables, fruit and lean protein. These are staples in my diet. Also mothers milk tea is incredible with fenugreek and milk thistle.

Now let’s talk some things that I don’t like during nursing. These are things that you may want to avoid or at least try them alone to see how your baby reacts to them once your milk is in.

Cruciferous vegetables are a, try when the baby is older, food for me. Broccoli, cauliflower and brussel sprouts are a few that fall into this category. These veggies are full of wonderful minerals and vitamins but they can also make you gassy. Guess what? If they make you gassy, they make your baby gassy. Baby gas for me is not worth it at all. It ends up being, up at night- crying baby for me and for me, sleep is more important.

Now if you are used to these veggies because you eat them a lot, you won’t feel the effects anymore but your baby still will. If it is something you still want to incorporate into your diet because of the health benefits (normally I love these veggies), try them cooked first, one at a time, and see if your baby has any issues over the next few days.

And just as you will get used to them so will your baby. Just go slow and try them every few days to see how your baby handles them.

Another on my not good for baby- list is, dairy. I have had one baby that struggled so much when I would eat dairy. It was awful. Tummy trouble, so much spit up and eczema all over his skin. With all the options for milk now I say just use an oat or rice milk. Make it organic if you can. That goes for everything but I know it isn’t super cost effective. Do what you can!

This is not a comprehensive list by any means but it is a great place to start when you are looking to turbocharge the foods you eat for breastfeeding or pregnancy.

What else have you used to help with breastfeeding?

Do you ever need help with knowing what to do in parenting? No? Me neither. HA! Of course we all need help! If you are doing anything right, you are searching out help from other places. Friends, family and more. One of the ‘newest’ ways to learn is on social media.

There are so many knowledgeable people out there that have courses, classes and advice and they are all at your fingertips. You just need to look for them. But not today! Today I have a round up post of the best parenting accounts on instagram for you to check out and enjoy. And when I say best I mean THE BEST. They have courses that I encourage you to check out but they also give you actionable advice in nearly any post. From tantrums to connection and reparenting yourself so you can be the best parent you can, these are the best accounts I have found!

@happyasamother A mom therapist friend you didn’t know you needed. Have mom rage? Check her out.

@peaceandparenting Navigating the messiness of parenting and also looking within to why we feel the way we do as moms.

@mrchazz A parenting and child coach with loads of knowledge on breaking generational trauma.

@transformingtoddlerhood An expert in toddlers 1-5, giving you positive parenting techniques.

@simplyonpurpose Positive parenting and connection techniques for all.

@biglittlefeelings Also toddler experts with parent course for kids age 1-6. Tantrums tamers for moms and kids.

@drbeckyatgoodinside A psychologist with a passion for practical strategies for parents to navigate parenting.

There you go! Now I even follow more than just these but these truly give valuable insights, tactics and steps to help with things I most struggle with! Go check them out!

Do you have any go-to people that you look to for help with parenting?

Do you truly know what you need for a baby before they are here?

Now that my final baby is almost here, I am starting to think of what I might need again. I thought my last baby, was my last baby (cue surprise) and got rid of a lot of things. I was still nursing him at the time but had started to donate a lot of things he was too old for.

It truly is amazing how quickly we forget what it was like to have a little one even when the youngest now for me, is only two. I find myself struggling to remember what worked well for me and scouring Pinterest for help. Somehow though it has helped this aging mother and I have gathered a few things I truly loved and will love again for my nursing journey.

Get a good pump

I know- a pump for breastfeeding? Yes! No matter what you do for feeding aside from formula fed only, you should have a pump. A pump seriously helped me when I had too much milk for my tiny baby and it helped me keep exclusively breastfeeding when I went back to work. It also helped keep my supply up. There is tons of information on the web for different ways to do it. You will need to figure out what works for you so take all the information but make sure you are not just following someone else blindly.

I used Medela for 3 babies and it was fine. It worked and it came with a bag, was covered by my insurance but seemed to wear out fast. My last baby I went and got a Spectra. It didn’t come with all the things like Medela without a pretty hefty price tag but I got the pump and parts. This thing was awesome. It has a light in case you pump at night near baby, it was so much quieter than the Medela and the battery was chargeable so I didn’t have to be tethered to an outlet. I could strap it on me and move about! It is still going strong. I don’t think I will need a new one for this new baby! Make sure you check with state programs to see if your insurance will pay for your pump! You can search information online.

Heating pads- for your boobs

There is a lot of information that says taking a hot shower and letting the water hit your back can help your milk come down. And it is true! The same goes for warm packs on your boobs. You can place these in your bra after warming them up and it will help get your milk moving. I was gifted these Lansinoh ones from a friend. They feel fantastic like a warm hug. In the beginning especially because you are sore while you are getting used to your milk supply and your boobs are changing. I would use these ten minutes before I pumped, nursed or just when I felt sore. Bonus you can use them cold too!

Haakaa

This little gadget is soooo nice. It suctions onto the breast your are not nursing from and collects the milk that lets down on that side. Instead of all that milk going onto a breast pad to be wasted or worse getting you all wet, you can keep it and put it in a bottle! Perhaps you can make it into the bottle that dad feeds the baby while you get some rest! Either way it is really great to collect that liquid gold. I think this time around I will try to give that milk to my toddler.

Lansinoh Nursing Pads

These pads are lifesavers for people like me who produce a lot of milk. My boobs would leak at the sound of a baby cooing. I couldn’t stop it. If a baby cried, I was done. It didn’t even have to be my baby! These pads kept it all in and no one was the wiser which is great when you are at Target and can’t nurse that very moment. I never had them leak out even if they were pretty full of milk!

Check out my quick tips for beginning breastfeeding here.

Supplements

A few of my favorite types of supplements for nursing can help you so much when you are just beginning your nursing journey. Especially because you can use a few of them to make treats. That is always a bonus because you are generally starving when nursing. Making some little protein balls ahead of time and keeping them in the freezer is a snack prep you will be happy you have.

I love brewers yeast this, as well as flax meal. Both of these are known to be galactagogues which support milk production. When you combine them with oats, peanut butter and chocolate chips and honey….well they make me happy. It is a tasty treat and it helps get that milk going. There are a ton recipes you can find online. Some even make them like a monster cookie! What nursing mother doesn’t need that?! I will admit though they are not the best to overeat if you are trying to watch your calories. But honestly I don’t think you should be too concerned with that while trying to heal and nurse a baby.

I also love a great protein powder. I have one right now that I really like. It is BOOBIE BODY and I really like it because it is plant based protein and still tastes decent. It has a flavor you kind of have to get used to but overall is good. It is said to support nursing and weight loss. I love that but also love how quick I can make it up when I am hangry. And I get hangry easily while nursing.

Burp rags

Whatever you like here will do. I just put them over my arm for the inevitable overflow of milk out of my babe’s mouth. And of course, for spit up. But when you have a strong let down, it is often too much for baby to take. They say baby should be able to learn how to pause the flow but none of mine have ever done that. I can’t hold them on my boob and watch them sputter to try to get that figured out. What I can and will do, is have the burp rag there to allow some of it out before latching baby back on when it slows.

I also use burp rags on my bed when I am nursing there. If I am laying down and nursing baby it catches the milk that would have made my bed all wet.

Huge Water Bottle

I mention this in another post or maybe two, but in order to be successful at breastfeeding, you need water. Now right after baby is born it is easy to drink a lot. Your body wants it. But once you get into the swing of things, it slows. Do not slow your water intake! It is said that you need half your weight in ounces of water a day without being pregnant or nursing. In order to produce the milk you want to feed your baby, you need to increase that amount. Now I am not an expert but you want A LOT more. Keep water bottles all over OR get a really huge one like this Hydrojug. I am not as big a fan of this one because it is plastic but I love the cute styles and carrying case. They now have steel ones!

I prefer my stainless steel cup but it doesn’t hold as much, but it is still a substantial amount. Bonus this one keeps water cold or hot. I prefer cold water a lot when pregnant and nursing. It comes with straws but I use silicone most the time because of my little people. I actually have two of these cups because I have one full at all times. If you will be in a certain room immediately after you come home from the hospital to rest and recover, you may want to have them both full of ice and just get some gallons of water to refill! And of course that is something easy for your support people to help you with.

These are honestly all things that I used and will use again for my nursing journey. There is always room for improvement and I would love to hear things that worked for you!

Do you have any products you couldn’t live without while nursing?

Consistency is everything. I don’t know that a truer statement has ever been made. Wait, you are worthy. That is also as true as they come.

They both fit in this context too.

Consistency is everything when it comes to just about anything you want to do. Parenting, learning to gentle parent ( hello me), working out, eating right, your morning routine, learning a new language and the list could go on and on and on. Honestly if you want anything to work even before you have the habits made or skills in place you need consistency.

This isn’t really about that per se. What it is about is motherhood and consistency. It seems to be a dilemma we have right now that consistency means perfect.

What this IS about, is that we do NOT have to be perfect. We do not have to have everything in place to be consistent. Consistent means that you keep at it. You keep striving. You do it repeatedly. Not that everything is awesome and you have to show the world how wonderful you are. Not that you don’t *uck it up and not that you can’t show the world the parts that you think are not polished.

Mothers and women everywhere need to stop falling into this trap. We need to stop believing that our worth is somehow tied to our perfection.

We need to give each other and ourselves grace to allow the human in us to show. We are divine, magical beings and we can do anything we want. We can do it when we want, how we want and how imperfectly we want.

You can have, be or do anything you want. Please stop letting your worry of perfectionism get in the way. Be consistent and human with whatever your goals are because that is all you need.

I am here cheering for you! You are beautiful and worthy!